taking care

Welcome to the Treehouse

We have big BIG news!

We have always thought of The91Rewind as a virtual treehouse. We have worked to build a warm and inclusive community devoted to encouragement and friendship. We love creating and sharing all this #goodstuff with you guys over the last couple of years. Now, we want a chance to connect with you offline. we have created a new page, The Treehouse, to share exciting events taking place in Richmond and Raleigh with you!

You’ll see a hodgepodge of happenings listed in The Treehouse. Some will be hosted by us, others will be events we are attending, but they are all 100% awesome opportunities for you to get out and about while engaging with friends. That’s right! You will have a chance to get to know your favorite BFF bloggers and be introduced to some really fine local businesses as well. our goal with these events is to offer a chance to pause our hectic schedules and do something nice for ourselves, just because.

With that in mind, we have two events this summer devoted to #selfcare and finding ways to easily integrate it into our day-to-day. Self-care is a hot topic these days. It may seem like yet another thing we have to manage in our busy lives, but it is definitely something we can benefit from.

So, what is it?

Self-care can be defined as any activity or ritual we do for ourselves to generate joy, peace, or other good feelings. There isn’t much to the concept; the fun is in the application. There are so many ways to practice self-care. For some people, it looks like a daily meditation, weekly yoga, or spin class; for others, it might involve taking “the long way” home because the drive is scenic. For some, this may look like a time of pampering with a massage or a day at the spa. This  could even be a week-long silent retreat at a tropical resort, or it may be just making coffee before work. Self/care doesn’t have to be fancy, in fact, the more simple your ritual the more likely you are to stick with it.

Why is it important?

Well, because it helps us to be better! Better for ourselves and better for all the people and things that depend on us. We all work hard, adorably badass-ing it up, and we deserve a little love. This may not make sense. It may even seem selfish, but it is a fact. Treating ourselves well sets the tone for how we interact with the rest of the world. When we take the time to be kind to ourselves, to seek out peaceful and joyful moments, we are nicer people. We work better with others, we are more kind and empathetic.

Get out there and PLAY!

My personal brand of self-care looks like playtime. As a marketing professional, life feels at times like one critical decision after another with high stakes and even higher stress. In order to avoid lashing out like a dragon lady at the people I love, I have to care for myself. I do this through movement; crank the jams, connect with my breath, and let that shit go. I get lost in the music and the flow and before I know it, I am relaxed and ready to put my thinking cap back on.

Just give it a try!

You don’t have to take my word for it. Trust that you are deserving of your OWN kindness and love. Productivity and engagement are best when sprinkled with play time! If you’re looking for places to play this summer, look no further than The Treehouse! Here are some upcoming opportunities for you to join the movement party:

  • #SundayFunday hip-hop flow @ Yogi Oasis! rotating Sundays, starting June 23.

  • Self-care Saturdays at NCDI! We’re teaming up with local businesses to introduce you to amazing products and services you can integrate into your self-care routine! Class details can be found here.

  • Sunday Yoga @ Lululemon North Hills –  always fun, always free! Sunday, June 30 at 11:00 am.


taking care

What exactly are we sorry for?

Every. Single. Day.

We hear women and girls saying, “I’m sorry.”

We are tired of the apologies because they are UNNECESSARY.  It seems women feel the need to apologize when they have done NOTHING wrong. So What exactly are we sorry for?

Our very existence matters.

When we hear someone apologize for standing where someone is walking, it’s as if they are regretting that they exist at all. We can’t read minds or know to step out of the way exactly when someone needs to move past or around us. Everyone needs to breathe, to have water, to eat, and to occupy space. Existing and filling space is NOT something we have to apologize for.

We need connection.

There are moments in life where two or more people just need to communicate voice to voice. It may be easier, save time, or help drill down to a solution. It’s beneficial, yet we apologize for interrupting. “We are sorry to bother” or “sorry we had to call.” Rather than apologizing, perhaps we could greet one another warmly. We don’t always have the ability to schedule a conversation one week in advance with a calendar invite. A simple “hello” and “how are you” is a great icebreaker and can help smooth things over without making us feel small. There’s no need to apologize for interacting with another person—even it is spontaneous or unannounced.

We want to understand.

Sometimes we need feedback. We need to ask a question to get more information. We need an example or clarification to really understand what lies before us. There is this idea that we can only do our best if we have the right tools, yet we apologize for needing access to these tools of success. That doesn’t make sense! How many times have you heard a woman say “I hate to ask you this” or “I’m sorry if this seems like a stupid question” or “I’m sorry but I don’t understand…” It is a fact that asking questions leads to better comprehension that can resonate with all involved. Those willing to ask the questions are not only brave but highly motivated. When we are sorry for needing a better understanding of something, we are essentially apologizing for doing the job to the best of our ability. How silly is that?

We have value.

When we apologize for trivial things, it diminishes who we are as people. Most people that we interact with are not unilaterally irritated with us. They are not frustrated with our existence. But when we say we are sorry for small things, we invite that response. It’s like when someone tells you they have a stain on their shirt. You didn’t notice it, but now you can’t stop thinking about it. Enough is enough already. Stop apologizing. Just stop!

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Each and every one of us is an adorable badass.

We are unique and each of us brings something special to the table. Our womanhood unites us, but our individuality helps us shine. You are not fucking sorry for existing, so don’t apologize. Save your sorries for those moments when you make an actual blunder. One that may cause a problem for another person like forgetting to do something you promised you would do or arriving late to a meeting.

Value who you are, the space you occupy, your beautiful voice FIERCELY and UNAPOLOGETICALLY. Because you my friend, are AWESOME! We are people who have feelings, desire connection, and experience emotions. We take up space. Sometimes we need to ask questions and get more information. Being human is nothing to apologize for.